Da Havs

We got up at around 6:30 with Ryan sleeping really good. I actually felt rested when we started our journey home. We got all 5 bags and 1 big box packed into 2 cars and headed to the airport. It was an awkward goodbye as Ryan got fussy and needed a diaper change and food. So we quickly kissed everyone and headed through security and immigration. We didn’t even make it to the Business class lounge and I had to make a bottle and feed him on the way. He sure lets you know when he is ready to eat and waiting isn’t cutting it.

Ryan did exceptionally well on the way home. The podegi kept him rocked to sleep half the time and the other half he was wide awake and checking everything out. We only had one moment of real crying and that was because he was still hungry after 160 cc’s of formula. I am constantly amazed at how much food this child puts away.

After 27 hours of airports and airplanes we arrived home to a wonderful reception of friends and family at the airport. Our social workers, Duk Young and Alice were there as well. It felt so good to be home and see my parents. They were so happy to finally meet their grandchild. And boy were they impressed! I think it was love at first site for Grandma.

We are thrilled to be back in our own home and Ryan in his crib! (in Korea we all slept on the floor together) He is doing great in it, once we can actually put him down. He is very active and wants to play play play. My dad set up the Jumperoo for him and oh boy is that fun! He really fights going to sleep but only wakes up once when he finally goes down.

We aren’t doing so well on jet lag. We went to sleep at 6:30 am this morning and didn’t get up until 3:30 pm. That doesn’t help any of us adjust. So tomorrow we are gonna try to get up earlier and earlier through the week.

As a first time parent, I am really surprised how I have no time to do anything! I knew it would be this way, but it is still a shock! Trying to unpack, wash clothes, wash tons of bottles, boil said bottles, pay at least a little attention to our 2 cats and still catch up on sleep? It will probably take me a month to unpack and I will never catch up on sleep, but I am home with my beautiful, charming baby boy and I have never been happier.

D

We went to bed last night around 11:30, woke up at 2am for first change and feeding, woke up again at 4am for second change and feeding and then was wide awake at 6 am. I finally got some good sleep between 4 and 6. It took me a bit to hear him making noises and I am laying beside him on the floor. That worries me a bit. I have probably gotten a total of 8 hours sleep since we got him. Even when I am exhausted, I can’t seem to fall asleep.

We hung around the house, showered (I finally washed my hair of all the gunk they sprayed in it for the pictures). We fed Ryan his lunch around 11 ish and wouldn’t you know it, he falls asleep until after 1. I actually caught a cat nap at the same time, I couldn’t believe I woke up before he did. We were waiting for him to wake up on his own but we were scheduled to eat lunch at Hav’s brother’s home. So when Dong Soon came to pick us up we just put him in the podegi and went. Once we got there, he ate again ( this kid eats all the time! the preflight report said every 3 hours, but sometimes it is only 2, he needs solids bad, but can’t eat them before he flies) and Dong Soon played with him for a while, and then Dong Soon’s wife played with him. When we left just after three, I put him in the podegi and he completely crashed. They played hard!

We got back and he was really getting fussy. When he chewed on his teether, he would make these awful faces and cry out. Not really upset, just uncomfortable and when I went to put some orajel on his gums, I found his first tooth through the gum on the bottom left side. I couldn’t believe it! My baby is growing up and I have only had him 2 days!

Tonight is our last night in Korea. I am sad to leave, but excited to get home. I want to see my kitties. I want to see my parents and friends, and mostly I want to be home with my husband and son.

We fly out at 11:15 am but have to leave for the airport at 8 am. Which equals getting up at 6 am to get everything ready. IGOO! Since we are flying internationally we need to be there 2 hours early. So our long haul begins. We are praying Ryan sleeps longer tonight!

D

Donna has pretty much kept up with the Tale of Ryan, so thought I’d just pipe in a bit. When we first got here, it still felt pretty surreal. Our first meeting actually reinforced that feeling for me, strangely, because he was just so perfect – happy, healthy and so mild-mannered. I thought it would “get real” probably at 37000 feet over the Pacific with 4000 miles to go to Minneapolis as he cried his head off. Meeting him the second time, at Mrs. Cho’s house, brought a big dose of realism. Not sure what it was specifically, but I felt like it was up to 70% real then.

It’s about 95% real for me now. Actually having him, feeding him, holding him, trying to interpret his moods and expressions, and yes, being unable to console him during his crying fit on the way home last night when he was exhausted and just wanted to lay down, have brought the reality of fatherhood to the front-and-center of my heart and mind. I think the last 5% is waiting for me at home. This may be the most homesick I have ever been… in fact, I don’t know that I really have felt this way before. I’m just ready to get HOME with my family, close the Prologue in the Tale of Ryan, and start Chapter One.

On the fun side of things, I can’t decide what sport(s) he is going to play when he grows up! He is so big and strong, I started to reconsider my views on letting him play (American) football. He rolls over with ease and has a strong grip, so maybe wrestling. If you hold him up, he kicks powerfully with his legs and bounces up and down – clearly, his vertical leap will surpass Daddy’s before too long, so he may be an outside hitter in the making.

We’ve done a fair bit of gaming so far. Peekaboo is a decent standby, he seems to enjoy it and smiles easily, but not enough to laugh and it only works for a minute, so I’ll have to rate it a 7. Whee Into the Air (holding him up and thrusting him up above your head) is excellent – easy to maintain eye contact, he smiles and almost laughs regularly, and can play it at length. Unfortunately, it wears out my arms and the drool hazard is formidable; still, it rates an 8. Stupid Googly Face is another 7, but I can do that one all day, so I might bump it up a notch with repeated plays.

Well, the family is hollering for me to come eat lunch, so I better git. Later!

Thursday night we stayed at the Seoul Hilton for our anniversary. We had a great meal at the Il Ponte Italian Restaurant and then watched American tv until midnight. We got up at 8:00 am Friday and took a nice long American shower and went down to our delicious American breakfast! We stopped downstairs at the flower store and got flowers for Mrs. Cho. We caught a cab around 10:20 and figured we would have plenty of time to get to Eastern. Well! Traffic was super backed up (Bokjap Bokjap) and we barely made it there by 11:00. Talk about stressing out! Kudos to our great driver for running a few red lights and driving like a crazy man.

We ran into Eastern expecting them to be waiting or already started but Dr. Kim hadn’t even arrived yet, so we were safe. Not only had Dr. Kim not arrived, but neither had Ryan! So we stood around for a few minutes, signing papers that we officially received him. Then Mrs. Cho breezed in with Ryan on her back. (I just LOVE the podegis.)

We figured Hav’s Mom and SIL would be a little late…but holy cow! (more here later)

Dr. Kim came down and said a few words to everyone, then the foster moms (Mrs. Cho and the FM for a couple from Australia) sat on the chairs holding the babies, while the parents stood on either side of Dr. Kim. Dr. Kim said a very long prayer of which I know nothing that was said (in Korean) and then Mrs. Cho stood up. I think she had a really hard time handing him to me, as Dr. Kim finally said something to her and she handed him over. I was bawling non-stop at this point. I felt so awful taking him from her. She was very sad that he was leaving her.

After everyone left, Mrs. Shin asked us if we were alright, as it was 11:15ish and we were the only ones standing there. We said no problem, our Mom would be here any minute. At 12:15 she finally runs in, traffic was awful for them too! It took them 2 hours to get to Eastern and it normally only takes an hour. They both felt awful as they missed the entire ceremony.

We headed back home to Hyung Nim’s and ate some lunch. We were planning on leaving the house at around 2:30 or 3 for Chongin Imo’s, but didn’t leave until 3:30. We got to Chongin Imo’s and EVERYONE was there. The whole family came up from Jecheon for our Anniversary feast and to meet Ryan. I was feeling pretty overwhelmed at this point…but everyone was wonderful.

After piling into the cars, we headed for the photo session. What progressed was 4 hours of makeup and photos for everyone. It took them forever to get my makeup and hair done, and the result looked pretty good. Ryan was fussy during this time and there wasn’t anything I could do about it, and felt anxiety for the first time in my life. WOW. What a feeling. It was really hard for me to feel happy during all of this. The photographer kept telling me to relax and smile, but how could I when someone else was caring for my NEW son while I was taking stupid pictures? Of course this is how I felt then. This morning I am less upset and can’t wait to see the finished product. I am afraid I will look awful because I was so upset.

After the pictures, we went upstairs for a wonderful feast of sushi and (catered) sweet and sour pork for Hav and I. I feel terrible because we just weren’t hungry. After being so hot and sitting for 4 hours taking pictures, we just wanted to relax at home with Ryan and get to know our son. Everyone was so sweet and helpful, giving us our space and being so good with him. They love him as much as we do. I am so thankful for that. Because it was our anniversary and the ‘birth’ of our new son, we received money as gifts from the family. What a wonderful loving family I married into.

We finally left the restaurant around 10:00 and got home at 11:00. On the way Ryan had his first meltdown of the day. He cried and cried and nothing would help. He cried for Mrs. Cho, Umma Umma. I felt so terrible for him. I was crying right along with him saying I’m sorry, she misses you too. He cried the whole way. We got home and immediately got upstairs, laid him on the bed and wham. He went right to sleep and he slept until 5 am. Okay this is a good thing if you weren’t trying to sleep with him filled with the most intense anxiety you have ever felt in your life. I didn’t get one bit of restful sleep.

Saturday when he woke up he was fine. Smiling at me, playing and talking. We got him changed and fed ( Hav is AWESOME at making bottles!), then he fell back asleep until 6:30ish. Then he got up again for a while. He has alternated sleeping, playing and eating so far today. Atm, he is napping and Hav is reading an EW. It is so wonderful to have Ryan in my life. I am so very very grateful to be Mom to this beautiful happy healthy boy.

As much as we love Korea, we are home sick and ready to leave. We are looking forward to getting into a routine and our new ‘normal’. I imagine Hyung Nim is sick of us and ready to have her house back. Hyun Hong took off to be with friends today, we must be wearing out our welcome!

D

We got to spend about an hour and half with Ryan again today. We called because we thought we were going to be late, but ended up being on time. We left Eastern in a van and all of us went to Mrs. Cho’s. Mom, Hav, Aunt and SIL. As soon as we got there, Mrs. Cho walked down the alley to meet us, and Hyung Nim immediately took Ryan from Mrs. Cho’s arms. She carried him up to her apartment. It was so hard not to take him from her.

After a while, she handed him to me. It felt sooooo good to hold him again. He is just so cute. He is getting really active and squirmy. He is already trying to crawl. He can sit up better and will try to push himself into a sitting position. He hasn’t quite gotten the hang of going from a sitting position to his tummy without just falling over. He had many admirers today. We got to see him in his walker and he just loves it there. Mrs. Cho’s neighbor came over and Ryan just adores her. She got him to laugh alot for us. Mrs. Cho’s other neighbor just became a foster mother as well, and a boy born a week after Ryan has been visiting every day. They are good friends. We got some great pictures of them together.

Mrs. Cho gave us a beautiful peach and green colored traditional hanbok. He will look very cute in it. She also gave us a picture album of Ryan from the time he was a baby. The pictures are so beautiful and you can tell Ryan was really loved in this family. We had a lovely time visiting but it was over way too soon. When it was time to go, I started crying. I didn’t want to leave him, I wanted to take him with me. I am not sure why it was so hard for me this time. Ms. Sung kept telling me it was only 3 more days! We said goodbye then came back home. We are hanging out at home, then going to Dongdaemun to visit a gaming personality named Tom. Afterwards we will go shopping!

D

OH MY GOODNESS! What can I say? We have the cutest little boy in the world!! He completely captured our hearts today.

But let me start at the beginning. Because I got up so early today, noon took FOREVER to get here. The longest morning of my life. We finally got on the road (sans water bottle, which was filled but left on the counter!) and headed for Seoul. It wasn’t so bad a drive, lots of things to see on the way. The bustling city, which reminds me of every big city I have been in. Unlike Kuwait that had mostly large vehicles, this country has all size vehicles and everyone drives crazy.

We got to ESWS at around 1:20 pm and went directly to Mrs. Park’s office. We got Ryan’s passport and papers for Immigration. Then we waited 10 minutes and went up to meet Ms. Sung. She had cut her hair since the video and looked extremely cute. We then went down to the observation room where we met Ryan for the first time.

It was so very hard for me not to cry, but I think I did a good job. His hair still looks funny, with half of it fallen out. It is kind coarse too, which I didn’t expect. He was in good spirits and drooling as usual. He chewed on the Elmo and Cookie Monster train, and Mrs. Cho said he was starting to teeth a bit. She said he was a very easy going baby and I can see why. She is an amazingly calm spirit and I felt very reassured by her presence. We spent about 10 minutes with Ryan alone (with Ms. Sung and Mrs. Cho) then we asked Mike’s mom, aunt and cousin to come in.

They oohed and ahhed all over him too. Kunimo insisted on stripping him naked to inspect his whole body. He didn’t mind at all, just kept trying to kick and roll. Ryan is already rolling from back to front and trying to crawl! He is such a happy baby, and responded to everyone that held him and talked to him. Mrs. Cho said he is very social.

Mike and I both got to feed him and he is so cute. He will hold his hand up, turn it around and admire the back of his hand while he eats. It is the funniest thing. So I started kissing his hand when he held it up. So then he started holding it to my lips to be kissed. I would make smacking noises and he would smile. He is a very messy eater!

He finally got tired after the hour of intense inspection and play. We started to say goodbye and he was content to just be held and rocked. He made sure to drool all over my shirt. Mike held him last and I got some great pictures of Daddy and Son. They look so cute together. He was really getting sleepy by this point and rubbing his eyes and nose against Mike’s shirt. Mrs. Cho pointed out that he usually does this when he is tired.

It was very hard to say goodbye, and Mrs. Cho knew this, so basically left the room quickly. Afterwards, we toured the children’s hospital and looked at all the newborns. She said there were currently 35 children there at the moment. When we were through, we were headed upstairs to meet the Drs. Kim and Ryan was in his podegi on Mrs. Cho’s back, sound asleep. I made sure to take pictures!

We met both Drs. Kim and a couple from Australia that were leaving in the morning with their son. They were around our age, from Perth and had been married 11 years as well, first child. Was nice to share a few moments with them, two pairs becoming families at the same time.

This all occured from 1:30-4 pm, so we had alot of time to go shopping! Mike and I forgot to change our $ into Wan, so we weren’t able to shop for gifts for friends and family yet, but Hyung Nim said she would take us to a different market tomorrow.

Traffic was so bad from Seoul to Incheon that it took us almost 2:30 hours to get home! I slept the last hour, moving car and all that ;P All in all a great day for the Havs! We see Ryan again on Tuesday for a home trip. Looking forward to meeting Mrs. Cho’s children and seeing where he has lived his first 5 months.

Anangijumashipso

I’m not just talking about the 7000 miles, obviously, although that was long too. (Three words for you: World Business Class.) Finally here and finally going to meet my son. Wow. That’s crazy. It sure makes me think, like it’s time to put away childish things and all that. (Don’t worry, that doesn’t mean boardgaming.)

And with this journey drawing to a close, the next big one begins. Life is good.